Monday, November 26, 2012
Stand up Straight Stupid
"Don't gloat Mom."
"Well I always told you posture was important."
I know, I know. "Stand up straight stupid."
"I didn't say that."
"You didn't have to but don't worry I've decided to blame Brat."
"What I'd do?" Asks Brat walking into the conversation.
"The list," I tell her, "is too long to atone for."
Her brows fly up and she looks from me to Mom. "Huh?"
Mom shrugs. "Her hands hurt."
Brat gives me an incredulous look. "How is that my fault?"
"Well you were always teasing me about ..."
"Oh," her head snaps back and she barks a laugh, "the watermelons."
"They are NOT watermelons." I say cursing the sibling shorthand. "They are not
cantaloupes. They are normal. N.O.R.M.A.L."
Maybe even subnormal but it turns out living life with your chin tucked isn't. My arms go numb, the nerves pop and spark and my grip is shot so I've stayed off the computer cause I can't do anything about the hours sitting in the car, the jumpseat or the airport.
Is this a pity party?
Nope. I'm thrilled I don't have arthritis, irreversible carpal tunnel or, gasp, the dowagers hump I'll earn if I don't stand up straight. I wouldn't even mention it but I haven't been visiting your sites and I miss your witty blog posts. Last I knew Dawn at Lighten Up was in the Walmart mens room and who could miss that?
As soon as I set up an ergonamic standing work station, realign my spine and learn to touch type I'll be back. In the meantime have a wonderful holiday season and don't let anyone saw into your wrists until you get a second opinion, a great chiropracter or physical therapist and learn to stand up straight.